Monthly Archives: August 2007


Mental-block! I’m speechless! It feels like my heart is being chopped up! I am, however, still alive and sitting solemnly. My body is – pretty obviously – to be seen. My heart is worshiping the crystal truth. What about my mind? It is somewhere north to paradise. It was impossible for my pen to reach the paper at all. A word devoid of thought is a dead thing, and a thought unembroidered in words remains a shadow. Vygotsky invented that . Vygotsky concluded that not me. I only learned blindly. I only nodded my head saying okay. Saying ok because your conscience says ok is like sitting in a living room engulfed in flames and saying there is no fire because the smoke alarm isn’t beeping. I only mock his cognitive theory which is slowly injecting venom into my tiny head. You are right. He makes my head ache. He makes me feel mentally sick. Only meditation can heal my mind. Vygotsky! I ask you why you exist in this guiltless world. Your theory would have killed thousands and millions of people. I won’t succumb and enter into your spider web. Watch out! I am developing and trying-out my own children’s development theory to create a peace of mind in each and every credulous child. My mind is polluted by all the factual invented theories which make me drunk while I am walking. I couldn’t comprehend any of them. Somehow I still suck in air.

Friendly thanks to my friend, Louis, for vibrantly explaining what he understood. His mind is surely cursing me for not being a genius. I salute him. He deserves to get an award for extraordinary patience. No matter how many millions of times I try to digest every written word, I still feel like vomiting. So, there is no point learning everything by heart. Before the quiz, I die. During the quiz, I die too. After the results of the quiz are released, I die for a third time. These all happened because of my losing concentration. I blame on distractions. They come from no where. I am struggling vigorously to adjust my time now. Distraction kills me. I carve all the genesis of distraction on the colourful rock. I am moving toward the window and throw the colourful distraction rock toward Mt.Kinabalu. I am perfectly awake now. I am refreshed from the pond of baptism. However, I am still scared I will be back into the same dilemma of this wretched disturbance zone!

P/s: It’s been a real tough week and hopefully Sunday will be peaceful…………for all. Have a good day.